Brandy Nubbins

I really enjoy the phrase “phoning it in.” It really epitomizes my approach to life lately. *Sarcasm 6 inches deep*

Here is a 10 minute free write I did awhile ago that still manages to make me chuckle every time I re-read it. Don’t worry – it isn’t supposed to make any sort of narrative sense – it really is just word vomit.

Meep eep cachunk kaboom ka-crash. Ello sue, Do you like bread? I’ve got French loaf *whack* “Bye!” I love you” In between the sheets of paper your words revolt and revolutionize the carefully planned thesis dissertation you sweated blood over into a mockery of skill and knowledge and tomorrow they will have reaped their vengeance upon you in front of the entire graduate studies committee. And when Professor Erding looks snidely down his long beaky nose at you with the air of “I was correct when I disapproved your acceptance” you are going to feel a most degrading sense of foreboding that this is just a taste of what’s to come. I like pansy wansy tooka toos and kangaroos and sunofabitch I swear to god she never pressed start on the freaking timer and I’m gonna write and write till my poor little fingers are so worn down they’re gonna call me “Brandy Nubbins!”

P.S. I wrote this more than 2 years before I ever heard the Baby Nubbins story, but the funny imagery invoked by the comparison of the two is not lost on me. *heh*

Published in: on March 5, 2011 at 5:22 am  Comments (1)